I,m back from my anger management weekend (see last post). The councillor was a liberal git so I twatted him and now I have no pent up anger at all. Marvelous. Thanks to Bill for the email about what he thinks about the council. I did reply to him asking if I could publish his four-letter tirade in this post but he didn't get back to me time so I won't (angry man, very angry man). As to the council and the problem I was having with my Council Tax bill going awry, I went down to the offices at Marmion House to sort it out. I got a bill printed out for me after a while and was told that they'd been into their records and surprise, surprise, my address does't actually exist. There is a simple reason for this I calmly explained. "A few years ago I changed my name by Deed Poll to Diogenes and I actually live in a fucking barrel you stupid bollocks!" As to to the progress of this week's quiz, I have the caricatures ready for printing on Wednesday but I still need around ten questions and the picture round and music tape still need to be done. If anyone wishes to contact me between now and Thursday night with suggestions, comments or anything at all you can as always leave a comment on this site or email me at quizard_97@yahoo.co.uk Don't forget to check out the joke, it is a genuine job application submitted by a 17-year-old to McDonald's and it's a doozy.
Three for Fun (Friday's answers)
In the western christian calendar, the name given to the Thursday after Trinity Sunday is Corpus Christi.
The Tablet is a weekly periodical of the Roman Catholic church.
Today's questions (answers on Friday)
1. London Landmarks: The Arts Centre on the South Bank was built around which building - the only one remaining from the Festival of Britain in 1951?
2. What is the name of the imaginary invalid friend invented by Algernon Moncrieff in Oscar Wilde's The Importance of being Ernest?
3. In 1924 and 1929, the Labour Party formed minority governments. Who, on both occasions, was the Prime Minister?
Joke Of The Day:
This is an actual job application from a 17 year old boy submitted at a McDonald's fast-food establishment in Florida... and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!
NAME: Greg Bulmash
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I'm worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.
SIGN HERE: Aries.
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