Friday December 30th

Nearly over. Christmas that is, I honestly hate this time of year as I never know what day it is. Yesterday I made a list of things I want to get done, to be honest I’ve neglected a few things; every thing seems to be “Mañana” as they say in Spain. Procrastination; the thief of time has always been one of my greatest faults; however, I do want to complete the basic things before New Year and plan the other things for January.

First thing tomorrow I shall be on the phone to E.on, and the thieves from South Staffordshire Water. I have so many others I wish to do; I shall just have to go through the list item by item. The cleaning will have to take precedence then bills and finally I need to go back to Sue Ryder Care and see about that Wall Unit with an intent to buy a bookcase and possibly a new desk, a couple more of the under bed storage boxes would be useful too, we’ll just have to see.

Christmas Day

Phew!! Well that was the main part of Christmas over. It was better than I thought it would be. Christmas Day I didn’t get up until 10:30pm and was just dressed when Cliff rang to say he was on the way. Unfortunately I was caught short and needed the toilet; at least I see the gastro-enterologist next month. We went to see Aunt Rose and Uncle Pete for a while, I’m afraid I didn’t say much as was still trying to wake up. We dropped off at my place to pick up my camera and the stuffing I made the night before both of which I forgot in my rush to get ready.

Christmas Day at Cliff’s was “an experience”. Hahaha, The kids were making a mess and poor Jack was asked to tidy up after them and no sooner had he done so that the “Amazon children” made more mess. Sarah was having her trials in the kitchen and Cliff joined the “forlorn hope”, after both Lee and Gina had popped in with presents for their sisters.

Though there was a problem with one of the cooker rings and Sarah was stressing over the potatoes for mash and forgot the peas, all-in-all it was a delicious Christmas dinner, the mashed potatoes weren’t as lumpy as Cliff said they were, the roast potatoes were perfect, roast parsnips, delicious, carrots, soft but al dente just how I like them. I thought my stuffing wasn’t too bad and my bread sauce was delish. To think I had never had it until Diane, an ex-girlfriend introduced me to it in the mid 80’s. Oh! Silly me I forgot the turkey which was moreish, the gravy, lovely, my Cava great but too much after such a surfeit.

On getting home I went straight to bed for two hours and then had 10 minutes to unwrap my presents before plodding into town to find a pub that was open. No joy. So I went to Lorraine and Craig’s a little earlier than I wanted to, in fact they were just having their Christmas Dinner when I arrived and I felt a little uncomfortable being there whilst they were eating. They were both very hospitable and when Steve got their we enjoyed several drinks, nuts and a cracking Peter Kaye video.

I didn’t leave until two in the morning and didn’t get to bed until six in the morning after catching up on my emails and chatting with Debs, my friend in Belfast.

Wednesday December 21st

I felt rough today and didn’t get much done until mid afternoon. I managed to clean the kitchen before I had to go into town though after checking emails and answering surveys.

Just the one thing to do today and that was to go to the charity shop Sue Ryder Care to look at the furniture I had my eye on. Unfortunately, the wardrobe I was keen on had gone and though there was a nice bookcase I didn’t think it was worth the price for two items plus the £10 delivery charge. There is no immediate rush anyway, I’d rather get Christmas out of the way first and take a deep breath in the New Year and start afresh.

I went to Bond’s after as Lorraine said she would be there to pay me back the money she owed me and after she had to wait almost three hours for her wages she was true to her word even though my legs were really hurting and my guts were not far behind. Like I’ve always said I look after those who have looked after me in the past during the dark days.

Tomorrow, I have no plans apart from depositing the money Lorraine gave me back into my account. As I mentioned before I want Christmas out of the way before I make any more major decisions or purchases.

Annoyance of the day:
Dirty sods who use the gents toilets in pubs without lifting the toilet seat. Disgusting!

Tuesday December 20th

Sorry, I’ve not posted for over a week and I’m not sure why. I honestly didn’t think it had been so long until Dad rang me to get my blog address. I’ll now have to recall what I did over the last week…

Cliff invited me for Christmas dinner and I accepted as though, I have trouble travelling at the moment, I think I can manage a mile, not that it would be nice to accept the invitations from Dad and Miriel in Padstow or with Julie and Ryan in Bristol again. My only responsibility is the bread sauce, 10 minutes, job done; nobody wants my special roast potato recipe. Anyway, I bought a bottle of Cava for us to drink on Christmas Day and if things get a little dull I can always flick mashed potato at Rosie and Emmie for a laugh.

I received a few redirected letters, one from the council threatening legal action if I don’t pay my Council Tax arrears by December 24th, the Amazing debt of £5.42. W@nkers! Waste of public money.

It is now late on the 20th and I’m trying to think of the important or interesting details of the past week or so. Not that there have been that many. The first thing I can think of was paying the bills on the 14th including the aforementioned Council Tax payment, well £5 of it, they can bloody well wait for the rest of it. I’m actually ahead by £1.50 on my TV Licence account and had my E.on gas account wiped out. I am still waiting for the water company to get back to me about the supposed debt I owe and then I can talk to the landlord and get a meter installed. I imagine there letter is in the post or more likely not of a great concern to them until the chinless wonders in their accounts department discover an anomaly on there database. I’m also waiting for the council to confirm my housing benefit award and moreover the dates it will be paid, like the other mail I’m waiting for it is stuck in the Christmas post. I also had to go to Boots to pick up my prescription for Iron and Folic Acid capsules.

I had a nice conversation on IM with Beki, the girl I went out with from November 1988 until February 1990, ( I remember all the important dates.) yesterday, she is close to qualifying as a pharmacist and I’m keeping my fingers crossed for her but I honestly don’t think she needs it, she was always as smart as paint and well driven. (Good luck Beki. XXX)

Yesterday, Julie sent me an IM to ask whether I was going to Calella next year. I honestly can’t afford to until at least August if at all. My priority must be my new flat, then my health, primarily my legs, then my gastric problems. I really want to go back to Catalonia next year, Calella firstly then Barcelona and Andorra.

The Landlord’s eejits finally came and cleared the fly tip outside my living room window and proceeded to burn it! There is still some junk out the back and I hope f**king Laurel and Hardy haven’t disturbed the nesting Dunnocks that were at the back. I want to clean the place out come spring and put in a nesting box and a bird table. There are also several magpies nearby so I want to borrow Cliff’s air rifle and irradiate the evil f**kers.

Finally, dad phoned me today and he discussed my present situation based on what he had read on my blog. After that conversation I’m going into town tomorrow to the charity shop to enquire about the unit and wardrobe I’m interested in.

Monday December 12th

Nothing much happened today, I checked my emails and did a few surveys, but as there was nothing left to clean in the flat I decided to go for a walk into town. I just did a bit of window shopping, no purchases. I popped into Bond’s to meet Steve who had the day off, using one of his holiday days before he loses them. A couple of pints and planning my Christmas dinner then I popped into the Coop to buy an onion and mushrooms for a curry I intend to make tomorrow and some frozen Yorkshire puddings for my Christmas dinner. Okay, I prefer making my own but as I’m on my own and I will only eat two or three, making my own would be less than frugal. I’m going to make my own potatoes though, no compromise there. I have a tried and trusted recipe for roast potatoes that I have used for 12 years. I’ll buy the carrots and swede that I want nearer the time but, though I will be alone I will have a great big pig out. Christmas Dinner has always been the greatest event for me over the years because I get to show off my culinary talents. Just a shame I shall be alone but I’m still looking forward to cooking it.

Sunday December 11th

I don’t know why I’ve felt depressed the last couple of days maybe because things have come to a halt with the new place as I still have unpacked boxes and I can’t afford the furniture I want to make it homely. It maybe that Christmas is coming soon too and I don’t like being alone at Christmas but I don’t want to go somewhere out of my comfort zone.

Cliff phoned around midday to ask me if I wanted anything from Bookers, Only cheese is missing but they only have truckles there. I finally got round to washing the dishes from my lasagne and gave the kitchen a good cleaning. I checked my emails and as I got ready to go into town I mopped the laminate floor from the bedroom to the front door.

I managed to phone Ron from Bond’s eventually to wish him happy birthday and enjoy the rest of his day and after A couple of drinks I made my way home which is where I am now, watching rubbish weekend TV, sorting out various official papers and making a pasta bake with the leftover ragu from the lasagne I made the other day.

Famous last words:
Either that wallpaper goes, or I do. ~~ Oscar Wilde, writer, d. November 30, 1900

Saturday December 10th

Actually, today was a very boring day, I got bugger all done, all I did today was collect my mail, meet my mate Steve in Bond’s, buy a lottery ticket and come home. Saturday night TV is so boring. I’m going to eat the last of the lasagne I cooked and have an early night I think.

Friday December 9th

I did have today all planned out but, the best laid plans as the adage goes. The electric meter was just below £2 and there were 3 letters for me, one letting me know the landlord had put my deposit in an account, a reminder about the unpaid bill from South Staffs Water and a card from the Royal Mail letting me know I had a package waiting for me at the sorting office.

After going through my emails and doing a few surveys, I limped into town and caught a bus to Blythe Street where the Sorting office is. £1.20 bus fare to get there. I knew what it was, an electric can opener, the very same that I bought Julie. Thing was, I liked it so much I thought I’d get one for myself and after using my Amazon vouchers to get Julie and Ryan something I had a bit left over so I thought I’d treat myself.

I got the bus back and the driver waived my fare, I don’t know why but you should never look a gift horse in the mouth as they say, most likely because you may see 500 Greek soldiers in full battle armour waiting for the citizens of Troy to go for an early night.

I stopped off in Bond’s for a couple of drinks but mainly to go through my list of things to do for the day. The dishes from the night before and mopping the floor will keep until tomorrow, mañana as they say in Spain.

On getting home I phoned E.on and got them to amend my bill to £0.00, result! Also, South Staffordshire Water, similar outcome, two – nil to me. The only problem I had was trying to get someone from Virgin to give me a straight answer about my bill. Honestly, these Indian call centres should be closed as the operators have only a basic command of English and don’t seem to know what to do if a problem crops up that isn’t in there training manual. I am now going to have to phone Virgin again tomorrow to try and get a straight answer.

Right now I’m watching TV, looking at the things I didn’t get done today and rearrange them for tomorrow, answering a couple of more surveys, (more cash, or vouchers :D) and after checking Yahoo Answers, eat a good sized portion of the lasagne I cooked last night now that it has settled with a portion of chips and then I’m off to the arms of Morpheus.

Today’s Annoyance:
Shops and services that close ten minutes early. Twice in two days this has happened.

Thursday December 8th

“Last night I dreamt of Mandalay.” Actually I dreamt of baby bro Cliff on a putting course and his ball turned into a tiny version of a Volkswagen camper van as it dropped into the cup and trying to lip-read a green frog who looked like a small man in a frog suit, a typical dream for me. No mail in the post for me today but the electric is manageable.

There were a few emails to go through, mostly from Yahoo Answers, (http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/), surveys and delivery notices from Amazon, Julie received her Christmas present I sent via Amazon today and her son Ryan’s was also dispatched today.

I spent most of the afternoon completing online surveys and chatting to Julie on Yahoo messenger, only taking brief respites to design my calendar for next year, (Maria Sharapova for July.: D) and having a smoke outside the living room and watching my most interesting new neighbours, a pair of nesting dunnocks who must be nesting somewhere in or close to the rat’s nest out back, (No, it still hasn’t been cleared.) The dunnocks are interesting to watch though, they provide a pleasant distraction, I would like them to get friendlier and trust me eventually.

In the evening I Made a ragù with mince, Sautéed onions with garlic powder, mushrooms and chopped tomatoes. I will make a lasagne with it after I make a Béchamel sauce, luckily I remembered to by some corn flour two days ago. What is left over can be mixed with some pasta spirals for a pasta bake or just a Bolognese.

Plans for tomorrow: first up, phone calls, I still need to sort out my gas from my old place with E.on, lay down the law to South Staffs Water, give the landlord’s agents a fillip to clear the rat’s nest, check my bill with Virgin and phone up a number for getting a grant for draught proofing. Later I shall go to the medical practice and get the results from my recent blood tests and make an appointment for the smoking cessation clinic. Okay, I would rather get another depressing Christmas out of the way first however, when I next see Mr Zayan again in April I want to tell him I’ve quit smoking and I can get my operation in May or early June. Having just put the lasagne in the oven I had better put washing up and cleaning down the kitchen on the list for tomorrow and the laminate floors need a mopping too.

Annoyance of the day:
Websites that won’t let you leave.

Tuesday December 6th

I didn’t want to start anything until I had seen the phlebolomist so I went for my blood test at 12:10 and was back home by 12:30. I booted up the P.C and got a warning straight off. Avast anti virus had found a root kit and advised deleting it and running a full system scan before Windows started (Another problem caused by Wayne using my P.C whilst I was away). While it was running I did the dishes, vacuumed the floor, and made a couple of phone calls about my recent change of address. When it had finished scanning I checked my emails and was thinking of going to the Credit Union but didn’t fancy making a special journey into town just for that so I will see if I need anything on Thursday and do it then, otherwise it will be next Tuesday.

I spent the evening catching up online and deliberating about what to eat for supper; I still don’t know what to have except it will be something simple. I shall decide a little later as I’m chatting on Yahoo Messenger with my good friend Deborah from Belfast at the moment. I have to agree that she has a point about not being so conservative in my posts and be more the radical person I am, so, thanks Debs, I’ll do that and hang the Devil.

Thought for the day:
Why do some people look forward and get so excited about Christmas then can’t wait for it to be over every year?

Wednesday December 7th

Nothing planned for the day, no doctor’s, dentist appointments etc, just a few phone calls to make. However, It was a strange day, if I think back to the days when I studied astrology I would say that Mars was negatively aspected as everyone I saw today were having problems, at least two people I know have problems involving violence, one, a female friend I am deeply concerned about as from talking to her seems to be resigned to her fate. She was also depressed and I didn’t need a doctorate in kinesics to figure that out. She has my landline, my mobile, email and messenger address if she has problems. I really hope she doesn’t need to.

Before I have supper tonight I got everything in the fridge so I can make a nice lasagne tomorrow evening. I have a few phone calls to make tomorrow to sort out money I don’t owe, well, that will be my argument and if I’m wrong I will put my hands up and pay those debts but I believe I’m in the right in at least two of the cases.

Things that annoyed me today:
Websites that won’t let you leave when you click back.

Monday December 5.

I don’t know why that it is that every time I have an early night that I end up waking in the middle of the night and am restless for hours later. I woke up at 4am and it was after 7:30 before I dropped off again. I didn’t wake up until the early afternoon and was disorientated, not great for my dentist appointment.

Lots of thoughts were going through my head before I had to leave like why does Cliff smell tobacco in the place when I can’t and I’ve cleaned the place and don’t smoke in the flat. I was so mixed up when I set of for the dentist I forgot the cheques to pay into the building society and had to go back. A little flustered and limping heavily I got to the dentist bang on time. I was only in the chair for 10 minutes and Dr Sunday Samuel and his nurse whose name I didn’t catch, and my new crown was fitted.

A quick walk into town and after leaving my prescription at Boot’s I paid my cheques and a bit more cash into my building society account. After picking up my meds from Boot’s and politely told a girl from Friends of the Earth that I was busy. She had the loveliest eyes I have seen in a long time, Scandinavian ice blue. I really must take more time in situations like that. Nevermind, I dropped off into Bond’s to collect myself and go through the mail I collected on my way rushing to the dentist. The bin collection schedule from the council for next year, a letter to inform me my appointment for the gastroenterologist has been moved until January 17th and my amended council tax bill. I stayed long enough to see Steve out of work and an enigmatic chat with my friend Loz. I am concerned about her; she has definitely got something on her mind. The long cold walk home but it was nice to get in the warm.

Famous last words:
Go on, get out - last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
To his housekeeper, who urged him to tell her his last words so she could write them down for posterity.
~~ Karl Marx, revolutionary, d. 1883

DECEMBER: Call centres, Bah Humbug, and hopes for 2012

Thursday December 1.

I know I said I was going to stay inside until my appointment at the doctor’s at 17:50 but after I settled in last night and got warm I realised I needed a few groceries so I may just pop down to Morrison’s or go all the way into town as there were a couple of things I wanted to do but forgot, I’ll keep one eye on the weather for now plus Thursday is kitchen day so I want to sweep and mop the floor and reorganize a few things.

Strange day from my perspective at least, having not being able to sleep earlier I felt awful later and had to drag my carcass out of bed later. I got into town 10 minutes before the Credit Union was due to close only to find a note on the door informing people that they would be closed that day at 12:45 and sorry for any inconvenience. That same note was not there yesterday when I looked at the opening times, Grrrr! Not to crestfallen at rushing into town for that one thing I decided to browse the same floor in the Coop. As is usual with the Coop everything is more expensive than most places though I did pick up a cloche for the microwave in the sale for 99p and a utensil holder for my steak knives which was just as cheap Had I any wine on my wine rack I would have bought an Italian Corkscrew for 50p but there is always next time.

Continuing the bargain theme I went to Poundland just for a tea towel holder I’d seen in there a week before but the staff had decided to park a great trolley of stock in front of the utensils and I got fed up with waiting. I did actually come away with a new mop and some Jacob’s biscuits for cheese both for a pound and cheaper than the alternatives, £3.00 for the biscuits, and £5.99 for the mop at Morrison’s.

I stopped of at Bond’s as I had time for a quick pint before my appointment with Doctor Bruce. I told him about the move to my new move and telling him I felt mentally tougher, something I hadn’t thought of before but it is definitely true, I certainly feel a little more confident. I told him my concerns about the feeling of someone constantly pushing down on my diaphragm and straight away he asked me if I had stopped taking the Lansoprazole tablets. I had to say I had misplaced them in the move. I physically gave myself a slap on the wrist and he gave me a script for some more though I did later find the original tablets. I should be okay now he told me to come back in a week if the problem was still occurring and gave me a blood test form and now Mr Pin Cushion has another appointment on the 6th with the phlebolomist at 12:10. I dropped my shopping back home and did the tedious journey up and down the stairs to check my mail and electric. £2.00 it cost yesterday, far too much. More tweaking required. Having sorted that and got a £10 mobile top up from Baby Bro XXX I went to get a few things from Morrison’s, I got everything except mushrooms, not one in the whole store! A couple of hours in Bond’s at £1.25 a pint and a chinwag with my best mate Steve I told him unless I was bored I wouldn’t be out until after the weekend. I need that fridge desperately and have looked at the other furniture Items I need but I will wait until I see the lay of the land when I’m back online before any major decisions.

Thought for the day:
Why do gynaecologists ask women to undress behind a screen if they are going to look anyway?

Friday December 2.

It was just before midday when I was wondering how long I would have to wait in for Virgin or if they would turn up at all, I didn’t have long to ponder as they turned up at 12:15. I left them to it and did the washing up mopped the floor and started the last of the laundry. There was a technical problem but they were done in around an hour. Before I sat down and got online I cleaned up the bits the Virgin team left and vacuumed up the carpet. The laundry was done so I put it out on the line and mopped all the floors. It’s time now to put my feet up and go through the 292 emails that I have accumulated over the past three weeks.

Almost 4 am now and I’ve spent the last eleven hours going through my emails. I had a brief chat on Yahoo Messenger with Julie and emailed a couple of people. I only stopped when it started to rain to get the washing in and to make a curry. Kitchen reeks of Madras right now but it is delicious and I will have some in a couple of tortilla wraps later. I had a nice surprise around 9pm when Cliff phoned and told me he had found a fridge for me on EBay and was going to collect it. God bless my baby bro, he went all the way to Sheldon in Birmingham to get me a fridge and it is a nice one too, it is in the kitchen waiting for the Freon or whatever gas it uses to cool it to settle then I can switch it on, tomorrow afternoon most likely 18 hours should be enough time. The only disappointment I had today was Ireland’s tough draw in Euro 2112, Spain, Italy and Croatia but the Gaelic spirit in me says “Bring it on!” England had an easier draw so the pundits say but they haven’t beaten France since 1997 and Sweden even longer than that and joint hosts Ukraine with home field advantage will be no pushover.

Thought for the day:
Give a fisherman a fish and he will eat for a day, give him a net and he can catch all the fish he needs for life, give him a boat and he can make a fortune holding stupid, arrogant westerners for ransom after they ignore Department of Foreign and Commonwealth Office advice not to sail across the Indian Ocean where Somalian pirates are active.

Saturday December 3.

Cliff rang me this afternoon literally 30 seconds after I plugged the fridge in. He was at Morrison’s just down the road and asked me if I needed anything. I only went there last night so no, I didn’t. He had to get the kids home for their tea so couldn’t stop off today, the kids will have to wait for their poster and a play on the grab machine.

The side door was open so no traipse up the fire escape today that was the good news. The bad news, the electric meter had dropped below £11. There were five letters in my box, a redirected Virgin bill, two cheques from E.on, a reminder from the Post Office that my redirection service would end soon and inviting me to renew it and a letter from the council concerning my Housing benefit payment. They have awarded me £87.72 per week which won’t cover my rent. I haven’t done the maths but it looks like I will have to find an extra £10-£12 per week from my own money to cover it, very worried right now.

For some inexplicable reason I had forgotten that it was Saturday and went to pay my cheques into my account at the Nationwide, of course they closed an hour earlier so I went to the Coop to get some sweets to put in the Candy Grabber for the kids and dropped into Bonds to see Steve for a pint and a quick chat. I got home late afternoon and had a brief chat with Julie on Yahoo Messenger and emailed a few people to let them know that I’m back online.

I am deeply concerned about the increase in my expenditure. Electric and the money I will have to find to top up my rent payment, trouble is that I can’t work until I have my bifemoral angioplasty which now looks like being in June next year now. I do want to get into work next year that is why I am seriously considering volunteering for the credit union. I can learn new skills and help people it would look good on my CV and might help if I really believe I can get a career with the UK Border Agency Immigration service. Okay, since moving I feel mentally stronger but that self-confidence issue is still in the background. Right now I’m going to heat up last night’s curry and eat it in some tortilla wraps and plan the week ahead tomorrow.

Quote for the day:
(Cooking) “When it’s brown it’s done, when it’s black it’s buggered.” Gladys O’Connor (Neé Plant) God bless you Nan.

Sunday December 4.

I slept so well last night despite going to bed late, in fact, I was not long out of the arms of Morpheus when Cliff tapped on the window. I really love it when he visits and brings Sarah and the kids. They bought me some Sunny Delight from Booker’s. I really love my baby Bro. I had previously bought a couple of boxes of chocolates to put in the Candy grabber so the kids were well amused. Cliff had bought me some Sunny Delight from Booker’s, I love my Baby Bro.

I was going to buy some tortilla wraps from Morrison’s when I realised I didn’t have that much cash so into town I travelled and got some cash out of the ATM and went to the Coop. Bargain! Reduced to 57p each, I bought two packs and noted how many they had left, a fair few, Curry wraps are a cheap meal so I was very happy. I dropped into Bond’s briefly to see Steve and Jeff and the rest of my friends before trekking home. I spent the evening catching up and organising my day for tomorrow. I already phoned Ron to stay in touch, I’m happy he is okay.

Evening and I’m going to warm up the curry I made and eat it in some tortilla wraps, take my tablets and take myself to bed. I have a few phone calls to make plus having that crown fitted at the dentists at 3pm , so lots to do but I’ll get through the lot by the end of the day.

Definition for the day:
Crêpe paper: French toilet tissue

Day 14 Thursday November 24.

That’s better, third attempt to type out today’s blog, Julie just phoned and before I tried to set the default spellchecker from English (US), (that’s not even a proper language, more of a bastardisation) to English (UK). As I was scrolling up and down the list to find English (UK) I inadvertently closed the box and accidentally set the default language to French (Mali), okay I have a certain command of the French language but not the particular dialect spoken in Bamako or Timbuktu so the spellchecker automatically inserted those annoying red squiggly lines underneath every time I typed an English word and it took me 10 -15 minutes to figure out how to reset the damn thing to the correct language.

As today’s cleaning rota says Kitchen and I’m already on top of that having just washed up and cleaned one of the freezer drawers I thought I would save myself a job tomorrow by vacuuming the extra bit of carpet I can now see in the living room thus leaving tomorrow completely free so I can do, anything I want basically. One thing I did think about late last night that is on the “To Do” database is joining the Tamworth Credit Union, I did make some enquiries about three weeks ago, but as cash is really tight at the moment I haven’t done anything about it just yet. Let’s face it, the rip off banks aren’t going to give me a loan in the current economic climate and even if they did it would be at an extortionate A.P.R whereas a credit union will give a good loan with a good interest rate and no more than can reasonably be paid back. I was also considering doing some volunteer work for them which is one thing they suggested to me, it seems though they are crying out for volunteers and I could acquire a few new skills whilst I am doing it.

Well it has just turned midnight so officially I’m 47 years old. Dad phoned me when I was on my way into town to wish me happy birthday for well today now, £1.25 a pint on Thursdays at Bond’s, you can’t beat that price. I had a few drinks with friends and told them I will see them tonight. I’m now just going to find something to eat, probably just a cup-a-soup, text Julie and open the two cards I have had. I’m actually so tired that I think I will be in bed and in the arms of Morpheus before 1:30 am today. EDIT: forget that, it is almost 3:30 in the morning, I was buzzing and tinkering around, I’m watching another episode of The Walking dead, making a concoction of Minestrone and mushroom cup a soups then going to bed.

Definition for the day:
Curry favour: Buying a take away for a friend in the hope of receiving something in return.

Day 15 Friday November 25.

Of all the days that I didn’t want my insides to start turning somersaults today would be that day, I woke up feeling absolutely awful, like a great rock was on my chest, which would be indigestion, dyspepsia, liverishness whichever you wish to call it. The last drop of milk I was saving for this mornings mug of tea had gone of so it’s black coffee from now until I get some money next Wednesday. I had three texts wishing me happy birthday, thanks to Rose, Steve and Julie, no last minute birthday cards or any post whatsoever but on the plus side the electric meter reads £5.69 so that would be less than £1 since yesterday, I will check it around the same time tomorrow afternoon to see how that is progressing, if I’m back to using just 80p per day then I won’t have to put to much in next week, £11.20 plus £7 to cover the emergency credit a round £20 should be sufficient next Wednesday now I’m getting used to these panel heaters and the water heater.

I was going to write this birthday off as a bit of a disaster, Julie phoned me from the Coach House in Eastville, Bristol and was having a nice time, then Cliff phoned me to wish me happy birthday and tell me what a horrendous day he had, Don’t ever change baby bro, lol. Loz texted me back and said she and Craig weren’t coming out as they were skint and it was too cold, okay fair enough but my mind went back to those horrible birthdays when no one turned up. I worked out how to use the shower after scolding myself then freezing after 10 minutes but it still beats washing in the sink as I have been doing because the shower wasn’t clean enough, got into my leather’s and met Steve at Bond’s, we had a good natter for a couple of hours and after Steve left I met a few old customers from when I was the bar manager at Rockwell’s (Happy days). I got back home around 2am and thought, that birthday ended a lot better than it started. I made myself a cup a soup and thought about something to else whilst thinking about what I need to do tomorrow but until I can get my broadband back and access to my Amazon vouchers I’m a little stuck, I think it will be a long seven days next week.

Quote for the Day:
(Whilst waiting in traffic once when another driver sped past) “Tut, tut. Better to be a few minutes late in this life than a few years early in the next.” Rosemary Snelson (neé Reid) Miss you mum XXX

Day 16 Saturday November 26.

I have just checked the electric meter at the same time as yesterday whilst checking for any post and it now reads £4.60 ergo, £1.09 used in 24 hours and that was with having the heater on in the bathroom whilst I took a shower and the panel heater on in the living room to take the chill off the room, so not to bad As for mail, one letter from those crooks at South Staffs water. They have sent me a bill for £46.89 payment due on or before… wait for it, November 23rd three days before I got the bill. Now, take into account that I paid the full annual charge on my previous property in full back in April this year and this one is a third smaller it is a mystery to me as to why I owe them anything at all, if anything I believe they owe me money. There is a contact number and yes it is yet another 0845 one but as I don’t have a telephone until next Friday I can’t do much about it. There is a box on the bill entitled “Nominating a contact” where I can nominate someone to speak on my behalf all I have to do is call them on the same 0845 number and request a form to be sent out in the post or alternatively visit their website and download one, again, no telephone line and no internet connection. This is the foremost reason I want a water meter, I went on a few sites a few weeks back such as U Switch and fill out a questionnaire as honestly and as accurately as I could and basically they all came up with similar results i.e. having a water meter on my mains supply could save me in the region of 66% annually! I shudder to think out much profit they squeezed out of me in the 9 years and 4 months I was at Orchard Street.

As I said before this is going to be a long week, four days before I get paid and pay any bills, minus the water rates and council tax until I have had chance to query them and before I do any of that I have to sit in the dentist’s chair and have a cap fitted and that rotten gnarled old molar extracted, what fun. At least when I get next Wednesday, (St Andrew’s Say out of the way, public holiday in Scotland by the way, has been since it was passed in a bill by the Scottish Parliament in 1997, Any sign of a public holiday for St George’s Day? I think not. Not in these days of work until you drop because of the failure of successive governments to address the pensions time bomb.) I should only have a couple of days before Virgin arrive and connect my services.

It was one of those afternoons and evening where you wish something, anything would happen or someone would call even if they were the most boring person you know. I have been so bored today just doing crosswords and waiting for the phone to ring or a knock on the door. I cooked a quiche Lorraine, chips, and beans for supper and it was quite nice, must get hold of a fridge soon though, I can’t keep half portions in a cool bag for much longer.

Thought For the day: If privatisation was supposed to give customers more options, why can you not change your water supplier?

Day 17 Sunday November 27

A quick pop down to Morrison’s for a pint of milk and a check on my lottery ticket, not a winner but it was a nice thought, thank you Rose, I don’t see why the sales assistant had to be so terse though, it’s not the customers fault she has to work on a Sunday, as the old adage goes if you can’t take a joke you shouldn’t have taken the job. I decided to do some laundry because with less than four weeks now to the start of winter (December 22nd this year) there won’t be many good sunny autumnal days left, problem is, I can’t seem to get the washing machine to work properly it only wants to run part of a cycle then just stop. Also, the door mechanism got broke during the move so that will be a game from now on to open that. I got everything out of the bathroom and calculated I have two loads of whites and one of coloureds to do, I just hope it doesn’t use to much electric. I was just mopping the wet room floor (must stop referring to it as a bathroom seeing as there is no bath in there) when Cliff rang and asked me if I wanted anything from Bookers, nothing I could think of at that moment well nothing that can’t wait until Wednesday after I’ve been to the dentists. He said that the girls were dyeing to see Uncle Dave’s new flat and could they pop round after they’ve been shopping, of course you can I said, I just hope no one wants the toilet or at least the wet room floor has dried by then. I hope to have all three loads done all the floors mopped and the bed linen changed by the end of the afternoon so that I can relax in the evening with… well nothing to do as usual, so bored.

Cliff, Sarah and there two eldest just popped round for a chat and a look, they seem quite impressed with how clean it is they just caught me cleaning so everything was all over the place and there isn’t anywhere to sit down at the moment with the two armchairs with stuff on them to be packed away eventually. I showed cliff the camera and took a photo of Emmie to see if it was just the screen and fortunately it is. Well the bathroom floor is dry and the washing machine seems to be working so I’d better put everything back in the bathroom and move on to the next job. Rose just texted to ask if I wanted any washing done but I told her the washer is fine, it just sounds different hear with no other sound, I’ve gone from being driven mad by perpetual noise to be driven mad by dead silence and I still have another two days of it. I don’t believe I am actually looking forward to having a tooth pulled and paying bills. I can’t do the kitchen floor while the second load of whites are doing and I still have half a load of colours to do but on the plus side, I’ve swept and mopped the floors and the laminate floor dries a lot quicker than the tiles in the bathroom.

Well that is it for today the colours will have to wait until tomorrow, the kitchen is on the cleaning rota for tomorrow anyway I just hope the electric lasts another 48 hours. Getting the laundry done wasn’t a problem, getting it dry, now there’s a different story. It is all drooping outside and I could really do with finding a long piece of timber to make a line prop, I did buy one from Wilkinson’s a few years ago but broke it banging on the ceiling to shut upstairs dogs up.

I don’t know what to do about my indigestion; I’ve had the same feeling since last Thursday now, like a heavy weight pushing in on my chest even deep breaths are painful. I went for a little walk to see if I could walk it off and it did help a little. I walked up past the tennis club then down to the local hostelry The Riftswood which is closed for refurbishment until December 14th, I shall probably give it a try when it reopens I haven’t been in there for about four years. On the way back through all the tree debris from storm damage I went passed the white fence on the corner of Hillcrest Avenue where back in 1991 Michelle Reeves and I stopped for a snog whilst a mutual friend was dropping off his girlfriend. Oh happy times, I wonder what she’s doing nowadays. Anyway, I’m currently wrestling with the DVD player that has decided to pack in, probably the heads need cleaning or something so I’m going to watch Alien on the PC.

Slinky: A boring person, especially a work colleague who has no raison d,être that you are aware of but does provide a brief source of amusement when pushed down a flight of stairs.

Day 18 Monday November 28.

A bit of a rough night last night, I think I will go to the medical practice and ask to see a nurse, there is no way this indigestion should still be bothering me five days on. First up though washing on the line, most of it is dry but a good old fashioned line prop will facilitate things. I will do the coloured load on Wednesday as I haven’t been able to get through the side door and check the electric meter; I am waiting for the postman to come so that I can kill two birds with one stone. I’m still going to sweep and mop the floor though and get it as near pristine as I can. I’m just going to finish my mug of tea and get the feeling back in my fingers after spending twenty minutes outside in the bitter cold checking the washing and then walk down to the medical practice.

Well that killed ten minutes, they are fully booked and I can’t see the duty doctor unless it is an emergency and I believe this constitutes one, all they could suggest is ringing up at 8:30 tomorrow morning, again with the telephone, it’s an 0844 number also so that is why I signed up for booking appointments online three weeks ago however, again, no internet connection. In another place at another time this would be funny but it falls under what I personally refer to as “spaghetti humour” (See definition for the day below). I’ve checked the post, the Frozen Planet poster that was free from the Open University via the Offers Oasis website that I sent off for Cliff’s kids has come, I shall send him a text shortly. The electric meter read £1.40 which, though wasn’t as bad as I thought is still going to mean things are going to be tight, I still need to make it through to at least 8pm tomorrow night to ensure the supply remains on until the following morning, it’s a case of using the bare minimum so laundry and hot water will have to wait now and I will wear a couple of extra layers tonight. Wednesday is a consolidation day as far as cleaning is concerned and as I’m on top of every thing I can mop the kitchen floor, do the laundry and vacuum the living room floor then, it shouldn’t take more than an hour and I’ll try and get it done before my dentist’s appointment.

I’ve asked a few friends and family if they know where I can get a sturdy old wooden line prop from, you know, the one your mother used to use not these rubbish modern, extendable ones they sell nowadays or even a good length piece of seasoned timber I can cut a V-notch in. My whites were sagging on the line and would have dried a lot quicker with a good prop. No joy yet, I’ll just have to keep asking, I have plenty of friends and acquaintances who knows someone who knows some one etc. I texted Rose earlier to ask her and see if she had a good antacid as it feels like someone is constantly pushing against my diaphragm every time I eat something. She suggested warm boiled water and I will give it a try before bedtime.

Definition for the day:
Spaghetti humour: A funny remark that has been overused or a situation that has now become tedious that it is “Pasta joke”. Ouch! Yes I know sorry.

I would just like to take this opportunity to say that I appreciate everything that every one has done for me especially recently and to make clear that I’m not looking for a “free ride.” Far from it, where I’m going I want to get there by myself. Okay things are tough at the moment but as the adage goes, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” I just need a fillip now and then. Okay, I will make mistakes on the way and I know from experience past and recent that there are a few curmudgeonly individuals who would take great shadenfreude in seeing me fall flat on my @rse but I will learn from my mistakes e.g. In the case of the electric I used unnecessarily in the last fortnight and wasting money trying to contact rip off utility companies on 0845 numbers but I will get there and it will be a greater feeling of triumph when I do. I know that family members especially want me to do it this way and are waiting in the wings for when I do to say well done. I think if mum was still with us on this earthly plain (<< Agnostic, covering all bets) She would be teary eyed right now, in private of course, in person it would be “About bloody time too” I jest she wasn’t that cold, underneath that hard prickly shell was a heart of pure gold who would move mountains for those she cared for. I remember when she first started working as a Home Help for Staffordshire Social Services way back in the early 1970’s when I was only about seven and the first person she was assigned to help, a Mrs Wood on the Tamworth Road died she was heartbroken, I remember the tears in her eyes when she got the news and this was an elderly woman who she cleaned for and had only known for a short while. That was mum. I would like to believe she is looking down right now and saying “Well done son, keep going.”

Day 19 Tuesday November 29.

Last night I was in excruciating pain, I’d often what the term doubled over actually meant well last night I found out. Just turning over in bed produced sharp pains, there was no way I was going to make it to the doctor’s surgery at 8:30 this morning in fact I was still in pain when the council rent assessment officer came to view the flat just before midday. It was I new from my late teens and early twenties, Chris Grocott, well he’s done well for himself I’m pleased for him. He said he knew me but for official reports he would have to see some form of identification so I showed him where to find the kitchen and wet room whilst I got my passport out of my jacket. Just my John Hancock on the form and he said he would leave me in peace. I was going to get up and make a start on the day but after retching in the wet room I decided bed was the better option. As I was going back to bed I noticed a slime trail by the door in the living room, another slug problem, I had this in the old place and it took months of setting beer pub traps and flushing them down the toilet in the middle of the night before I finally eradicated them.

It was around 3pm before I felt well enough to get out of bed though I was still in some discomfort, I will have to see what Dr Bruce makes of it when see him on Thursday night. I’m dreading eating anything later but must have something before I visit the dentist tomorrow. That is if he will perform surgery on me in the condition I’m in well maybe he can fit the cap and we can put off the extraction yet again, we shall see.

It was throwing it down outside, good job I got my whites laundered and dry yesterday and I didn’t risk doing my coloureds last night I don’t know when I will get another good drying day. The long trek up the fire escape and back down the inside of the building only revealed junk mail, leaflets from Aldi’s and Farmfoods plus a charity appeal for the Royal British Legion which carried the message “YOUR FREE GIFTS ENCLOSED.” Why people and organisations still use the term free gifts is a mystery to me as all gifts are free, a classic example of tautology. With apprehension I checked the electric meter and found still 46p emergency credit left that is just 94p less than yesterday, I’m finally figuring out how to get the most from it and it only has to last until 8pm tonight then if it does go into the red it won’t cut out before 8am in the morning, Okay, ideally I would like it to last until I have to make my way down to the dentist around 1:50pm so that I can be finished there, collect my money from the Post Office, visit the Nationwide, pay a couple of bills, get some electric and get a few bare essential food items but again we shall have to wait and see.

Well it started, I knew it would at some stage, that inner voice that niggles at you and says, “You know that would look better over there” and “you would be better off if that was nearer to that” etc. We’ve all had those annoying voices and so I decided to act on one just to shut it up. I shut down the PC as I knew from experience that moving it while it is still on is a very bad idea, trust me, and don’t try this at home. I pulled it over 18” give or take messing up the cables that I had diligently taped up to stop them getting tangled up then dragged the desk up to the power sockets before dragging the set of drawers with the printer/scanner on top from the left to the right of the desk. That inner voice said “see. That’s better when Virgin come on Friday they can put the cable and phone jack right where they need to be and you will be able to get a clear view of the TV after manoeuvring it back into place after the engineers have connected the cable to the set top box and modem.” “Simples” as that meerkat on TV keeps saying.

Thought for the day:
A dog is truly man’s best friend… He will never tell the wife where you were when you were supposed to be taking him for a walk.

Day 20 Wednesday November 30.

I don’t know what time the electric cut out I only knew it had by the sporadic beeping of the smoke alarm in the bedroom. I was getting ready for my dentist’s appointment at the time. It was then that I got a phone call on my mobile from E.ON with reference to the terse letter I sent them a few days ago. They were very apologetic and in addition to the credit on my old meter they are going to send me a cheque for £10 to cover my phone expenses for all the time I was kept on hold so it does pay to complain in a constructive manner, I doubt I would have got such a warm response had my letter been a litany of diatribe. I also mentioned that at least two other residents that I am aware of have accounts with E.ON so it would seem NPower have been telling porkies, I will make some enquiries, and if that is the case I will switch back to E.ON. I don’t like to be messed around or lied to by these big companies, British Telecom found that out when I moved to Orchard Street in 2002. I’d been with them for a while but they wanted £75 just to put a landline in plus an extra £20 for the modem. It was then I went with Virgin, NTL as it was back then. They came in, fitted a cable exactly where I wanted it and provided me with a modem both for free and they were done and I was ready to start surfing in a matter of ten minutes.

I got to the dentist bang on 2:10pm and didn’t have to wait to long. The nurse told me that they hadn’t got a contact number for me as the crown I was to have fitted wasn’t arriving until tomorrow, they do have my mobile number because they’ve sent me text reminders before, just because I change address doesn’t mean I change mobile numbers too, daft buggers. I just had the extraction done today and will have to go back for the crown on Monday afternoon.

With the right side of my face numb I took a steady walk into town to draw my money from the Post Office, had a quick browse in Poundland, and bought a pack of three scissors whilst resisting the urge to ask a sales assistant “How much is this.” Next stop Nationwide to deposit £100 a quick look in Brighthouse at a fridge/freezer on sale at £303 then to Wilkinson’s. I only wanted a tube of leather glue for the sleeve of my jacket but I did get a few ideas. I resisted the urge to make any purchases thinking to myself, well okay it’s nice or I could do with one but do I desperately need one? Not at the moment. So I backtracked and bought some leather glue from Tamworth Toolbox, paid my TV license payment, put £25 on my electric key, bought a lottery ticket then parked my backside in Bond’s for a drink. After around two hours I noticed the feeling coming back in my face and a pain in the right side of my mouth as the anaesthetic began to wear off I was in quite a bit of discomfort and only had the two pints, Steve managed to knock back three in the hour from when he got in from work and the time he left leaving me to struggle on my second. It was cold and miserable and that was just the bar. The cheapskate won’t put the heating on, so I made the long trek home freezing cold and in pain. Up the fire escape and back down inside the building again to load up the electric meter which now reads £17.01 after the debt from the emergency credit was taken off and then back into the warm which I have no intention of leaving until my appointment with Dr Bruce tomorrow evening.

Feeling tired and with my gum still hurting I cooked myself a steak pie with chips peas and gravy took a couple of Co-Dydramol tablets and was in bed for just after 10:30, first time that has happened in a long time. I could feel the effects of the analgesics after only ten minutes and soon after fell asleep.

I woke up around 4am and finally gave in and got up no doubt I will need to go back to bed even just for a couple of hours a bit later it’s 05:30 now and I have just turned the calendar over to December, pity those parents who are now to be pestered by their kids about opening their advent calendars over the next month, filled my water bottles up and stuck them in the freezer to chill for twenty minutes, I have been drinking quite a lot of water recently in fact, I rarely leave home without a small bottle of tap water. What I am doing now is adding those things I would like to the database so I remember them, I have no problem with that as each thing has a priority number assigned to it, 1 for desperate for down to 5 for be nice, understandably the fridge is still number one. With Virgin coming on Friday, (there will be hell to pay if they don’t) I want to get into my various survey accounts and get the Amazon voucher codes sent to me by email, £50 worth would be very handy right now.

Quote for the Day”:
“You must call again when you have less time.” Oscar Wilde.

Day 6 Thursday November 17.

Last night was the first time in a week that I got to bed before 2am. This morning I had to climb the fire escape and come all the way down inside to check my mail and electric meter, I am a little concerned as to the amount of electric I’m using at the moment, £2 yesterday as opposed to 80p I was using at Orchard Street. Mail wise there was a card informing me that I have a parcel ready for collection at the sorting office on Blyth Street, that will mean a bus journey tomorrow as my poor legs won’t carry me that far and back again. It is either the free Stella Artois Cidre glass or the free energy monitor both of which I applied for on Offers Oasis online, loads of free stuff and great free competitions on that site, Well there will be once Virgin pull there fingers out and get me reconnected. On the plus side so far today the first of four suitcases I went trawling through contained my travel document wallet containing my travel insurance policy and most importantly my passport, panic over and something else to tick off from my “Things to do” database.

I put my leather’s on for the first time in two years and made my way into town briefly stopping of at the medical practice to make an appointment to see Dr Bruce on December 1. I checked my lottery ticket at the Coop, no luck. , then went to Wilkinson’s on the pretext of buying a washing up bowl. Okay I’m not desperate for one but my logic thinks that it takes a lot less hot water to fill up a bowl than a sink and the £2.50 It cost me will pay for itself eventually. I also bought a teaspoon and teabag rest, I’m just still in the mindset of keeping everything clean and tidy, the only trouble now is that I’ve bought these two items from the Poppy Collection at Wilkinson’s I will now have to collect the rest of the set. I do actually need a new bread bin and biscuit jar as the old ones went in the bin and the tea, sugar, and coffee jars that I’ve had since the late 80’s are showing their age mainly because of the scrubbing they’ve had mainly because they used to sit beside a deep fat fryer (Won’t have another one of those again).

I dropped into Bond’s for a drink and to catch up with friends, one of which is Dave who told me he has a fridge/freezer and only wants £40 for it, definitely something to consider.

At present, I’m going to clean the vegetable storage bins so that tomorrow I can finally get to clean the oven that I have putting off for the last four days and the cheese encrusted toasted sandwich maker.

Vegetable bins cleaned and draining and washing up bowl in its new place. As I said before, tomorrow I shall finish the kitchen, I need 30 minutes to 2 hours to leave the oven cleaner to work its magic before I can clean it off and then go to work on the exterior, in the meantime I can clean the toasted sandwich maker and then apart from acquiring a fridge or fridge/freezer and replacement microwave, which should be here by the weekend all I need to do is mop the floor and I can finally make a start on the bathroom, the bedroom ( when the old junk has gone Saturday morning. I can’t really do much more until I have a wardrobe, wall unit and bookcase, then I can finally go through all these boxes and clean the carpet in the living room and the laminate floor in the bedroom a few more tasks to tick off the list, I must remember to take the bus to collect my package from the sorting office tomorrow, actually, I could do that whilst the oven cleaner is doing it’s job.

I can’t believe it is after 10pm already, Tempus Fugit, I think I shall finish off the Mushroom Stroganoff and mashed potatoes and think if there is anything else I need to do or put on my “To do” Database which is now down to 43 items from around 70.

I need to watch the cash flow situation, okay, I’m fully up to date with my TV license payments and the Council Tax for this year is paid apart from 72p and £19.28 “for other notices” whatever the fcuk (stet.) that means and I also have plenty of food in but I want to keep at least £10 aside just so I can have a few drinks with friends on my birthday a week tomorrow.

Word for the Day:
Callipygian: A person with very shapely buttocks. (I kid you not.)

Day 7 Friday November 18.

Slow start to the day but Friday for me is the most boring day of the week as no one is about and nothing much happens. I hobbled down to Victoria Road to catch a bus to the Post Office sorting depot (£1.20 there, £1.20 back again.) I stopped off for a drink and to examine my new package as I know I haven’t ordered anything from Amazon in 3 months. It revealed as a cordless phone and I thought, “I didn’t order that!” Then I saw the note inside it was a birthday present from Julie in Bristol, thanks for that sweetie XXX.

Early evening and I had no sooner got through the door than I got a text from Rose telling me they would be down at 9am in the morning; I hate mornings, better set the alarm. No sooner had I received that text Julie rang to catch up, she has no electric and has to take Ryan to the hospital tomorrow, very stressful.

I put my rubber gloves on and sprayed the oven, need to leave it to work its magic until no later than 8:45 pm. I went to the end of the drive for a smoke and watch the world go by. The National Grid are doing some gas works down the road and have set up a set of temporary traffic lights. A couple of blondes in a hatchback pulled up, wound the window down and started chatting to me, It’s great just to get a smile from a pretty girl but being chatted up puts a spring in my step. It’s the leather jeans. I must get another pair, they are serious lady killers. Lol.

I went up to the phone box on Wiggington Road with the intention of contacting Virgin but that particular call box doesn’t accept coins only credit/debit cards after phoning a number to leave your details. B*ll*cks to that! I backtracked and used the payphone at Morrison’s and the engineer took my number and is due to phone me tomorrow between 11am and 1pm, hopefully I will get connected very soon. Right now the oven should be ready for wiping, I’ve left it an hour and a half, and can’t stand the smell of ammonia any longer so I best get to it.

I feel more than a little queasy now, when they said “give it a liberal spraying”, (Spray on and wipe off my @rse!) I wished they’d defined liberal, William Gladstone Liberal or Lloyd George liberal. Anyway the internal oven is clean and when I feel a little better I shall tackle the outside with a cleaner that has a shorter half life then I can do the toasted sandwich maker and mop the floor and apart from a fridge et voila! Bathroom tomorrow I think, that shouldn’t take too long, famous last words.

It is almost 10pm now and as Rose and Pete are coming first thing I’d better think about bed. I finished the outside of the oven and overall I would say that I was 85% satisfied with it, there are some stubborn stains that even Cillit Bang couldn’t shift but when I get into a regular cleaning regimen I hope to wear them out eventually I just don’t want to scratch the surface and spoil it, I want it as pristine as when Ron and mum gave it to me. I didn’t get round to the toasted sandwich maker or clean the floor as the smell of ammonia is still quite pungent. I’m going to find something simple to have for supper then go to bed.

Thought for the day:
If Wile. E. Coyote has so much money to spend on all those Acme products why doesn’t he just go out and buy dinner?

Day 8 Saturday November 19.

Early start by my standards, Pete arrived bang on 9am with new cushions and a birthday card from both he and Rose, thanks both I was ready and waiting, Cliff however had overslept but I guess he’d had a hard week. The oversized TV, futon, its base, the hi-fi stand and two speakers all fitted nicely into the back of Cliff’s estate and off to the dump they went.

In the afternoon I phoned the engineer from Virgin again and he said he would call me back soon with an instillation date… he didn’t. I had to phone him again just after 5:30pm at which time he was at home with a screaming two-year-old in the background, he did promise to call me tomorrow, I hope so, I am rapidly running out of credit on my phone.

Early evening and it’s time to finish the kitchen, minus a fridge of course, just last night’s washing up, the toasted sandwich maker and a mop of the floor then it’s done, I will do the hallway and the bedroom floor while I’m at it then put the brushes in bleach to soak then tomorrow I will clean the bathroom.

The engineer from Virgin called back and will give me a ring tomorrow and send a contract through the post which I should receive by Tuesday. Doesn’t look like I will be connected before my birthday I think. Nevermind, apart from the mopping the kitchen is now done, I was going to do that then I saw the state of the mop bucket so decided to put that to soak for an hour or so. I gave my world globe a good wipe over as it was a little grubby, “Come here Eritrea. It’s about time you had a good scrubbing, you too St Kitts and Nevis.”

Mopping done, just can’t leave the living room until it dries,). My mop is looking a little worse for wear but Orchard Street was all carpet, even the kitchen so I haven’t used it in a while, I think I had better put that on my Christmas list to Santa as well. The list of things to do is actually below 40 now so I am getting there. Back to Orchard Street, I met one of my old neighbours in the town today and he told me that my ex landlord had already rented out my old place for £360 more per calendar month than what I was paying, In the words of P.T. Barnum, “There’s a sucker born every minute.” Wait until the poor individual finds out he hasn’t any central heating or hot water, the front door is hanging by a thread, the smoke alarm doesn’t work, the electrics are dangerous and the overflow from the kitchen sink empties into the cupboard below.

After careful consideration and mopping scrubbing etc, I decided that the one thing that this place is missing is a utility cupboard for things like mops, buckets, vacuums, ironing boards, (when I get one) etc. I’m sure I’ll find space for everything eventually.

I was going to get the chicken out of the freezer to defrost over night but earlier I realized that without a fridge I can’t store what is left, so frustrating not having a fridge. What I’m doing now is using up the chicken in sauce, the last of the mushrooms and some onion with some of my spices to make a curry and eat that in some tortilla wraps for supper. That’s three things out of the freezer bag.

Quote for the Day:
“If it starts to thunder and lightning whilst I’m on the golf course it’s safer to wait it out. If God wants to play through let him.” Bob Hope.

Day 9 Sunday November 20.

Lazy Sunday, I have decided to just consolidate what I have got done so far, and not start anything major today, okay the wet room just needs the sink and shower cleaning and I made a start on the latter last night and I might get to that later on and sorting my tool box and having a sort through my clothes draws but there isn’t much more I can do especially until Virgin transfer my services which looks like it may be next weekend, the problem seems to be that I had conflicting information from the engineer and initially the call centre in Mumbai, Delhi, Chennai or wherever it is, certainly not anywhere within a 2000 mile radius. So, as I said consolidation is the word for today, a quick going over of the kitchen which smells of the Madras chicken curry I made last night and I will take the mop and brushes out of the bleach I left them in to soak overnight.

Maybe it is because it is dark earlier or more likely that I have no external stimulus such as TV or broadband that it seems a lot later than it is. Any road up as my grandmother used to say I finished the kitchen and cleaned the wash basin in the bathroom and I thought that was enough for today consolidation being the watch word. I got my mail which was late on delivery from yesterday, just need to see the council tomorrow about this I guess standardized letter they always send out, I certainly don’t owe £300 + in council tax. Idiots!

I have spent the afternoon generally tinkering about and updating documents on my PC, I tried to connect the TV to the DVD player but I was never very good at that so I hope Virgin will sort it out for me. I thing I did manage on My PC is to sort out a cleaning regimen and as tomorrow it is the living room, well a quick wipe down of the walls and a vacuum of the 50% carpet I can actually get to at the moment.

I have basically just put things in some semblance of order, I shall go to the council first thing, post Julie’s birthday present, enquire at the credit union about opening an account and the possibility of volunteering. I suppose I should try and contact E.On about my supply and there was something else but it will come to me, I did note it down in my pad. Yes! Specsavers regarding a change of address, not so important, my next check up isn’t due until next June, I also need to check my lottery ticket, you never know.

Thought for the Day:
Dogs have owners, cats have servants.

Day 10 Monday November 21.

Frustrating, that is the word to describe today. It didn’t help that it was the coldest day of the year as far as I remember. First pointless stop was to the council to sort out this Council Tax bill, I was told that it was basically a standard letter they send out and the Council Tax department had acted before the housing department good do an assessment, the phrase putting the cart before the horse is very apt. Next stop Coop to check my lottery numbers, no luck there and then a glimmer of hope, I managed to post Julie’s birthday present off and it only cost just over £2, she should get it by Thursday at the very latest. As I have no landline as yet I knew the next task would be a nightmare but little did I know how expensive and frustrating it would be. It was my fourth attempt to contact E.On to cancel the electricity contract for the new flat. I ended up putting £3.80 into a call box whilst being put on hold for 20 minutes listening to music with the occasional message “Thank you for continuing to hold one of our advisors will be with you shortly” or “We are currently experiencing a higher than normal call volume” that is the same whatever time of day you call them. And my personal bête noir, “Your business is important to us please continue to hold, one of our advisors will be with you shortly” If my business is so important to them why don’t they employ more staff to deal with the calls? God knows these companies make enough profit every year. One solution I can think of to afford more staff is to sack these pointless PR spin doctors who appear on TV and expect consumers to swallow there b*llsh*t. “Oh the price of electricity has gone up” and when it goes down, “Well it will take time for the savings to filter down to our customers” My personal opinion (and I’m not alone) is that the utility services should never have been privatized, thank you so much Maggie bloody Thatcher. My next job, seeing as I can’t contact E.On by phone is to write them a very terse letter cancelling the contract and letting them know that the £10.88 that I was in credit has been gobbled up by their 0845 numbers, which should be made illegal for such services.

Why do I bother? I was just on my way to the post box to send my letter to E.ON when I got a call from the Virgin engineer, it will now be December 2nd before I get connected. I was still fuming and a little crestfallen on my way out when my picture of the Japanese goddess of Spring fell off of the wall, I hung it else where and literally 3 minutes ago it fell off again, maybe she is trying to tell me that winter is only five weeks away. I had enough by now and whacked in a panel pin instead of the sticky hook this time so she shouldn’t be going anywhere this time.

Thought for the day: I’m so broke I can’t even pay attention.

Day 11 Tuesday November 22.

A slow start to the day, better than yesterday anyway, I remember waking up this morning to complete silence, no yapping Jack Russells, So silly old women nattering outside my front door, nothing. In between washing and tidying up the kitchen and vacuuming what bit of the floor I can see, Cliff phoned to see how things were going, he said he would look out for a wardrobe for me on Freecycle, which will be a great help.

I received the contract from Virgin Media in the post this afternoon and signed and posted it back off, I can’t believe it is going to be another 10 days before I get my services connected but at least I won’t have any charges for those three weeks, the electric is still a major concern, I seem to be spending more than double than I was previously and going onto emergency credit now seems inevitable. I’m not sure what I’m going to do tomorrow, it’s cleaning day off according to my new rota, there are a few things I can still do it just depends on how I feel after my dentist’s appointment at 2pm, I have to have a cap on a molar on my left lower jaw and an extraction on the right lower jaw but to be fair, I have been putting that off since May.

The rat’s nest out the back has increased, new sofa there now but I have been told that it is all being sorted out this week as the council have intervened, we will just have to wait and see.

Quote for the Day:
“A man is a success if he gets up in the morning, goes to bed at night and does whatever he wants in between.” Bob Dylan.

Day 12 Wednesday November 23.

I don’t know if it was my trip to the dentist that got me down or the fact that I’m bored stiff. I was in the dentist’s chair for half an hour and that was just preparation work for my new crown, I have to go back she same time next week to have the crown fitted and probably the extraction of the molar on the other side. The tooth itself even with Novocain was extremely sensitive and as usual when I’m in the dentist’s chair I try and think happy thoughts, this time, as with the last couple of occasions I was in Papa’s bar in Calella on a hot Catalonian afternoon sipping on an ice cold pint of Damm Estrella lager. I really want to go back there some time next year.

When I got home I checked the mail and electric, no mail and just 43p on the electric meter so I had to go on emergency credit but it is still going to be touch and go as to whether it will last another seven days. Thinking back over this last week it is shocking to think of how much money has been wasted. Those heaters are expensive to run as is the water heater, this time last week the meter read in the region of £14 - £15 that has almost all gone now and there was that scandalous waste of over £10 trying four times to contact E.ON, those 0845 numbers should be made illegal. I really have to watch my cash flow now as I’m down to my last £2.31, just enough for one pint on my birthday on Friday unless I can rely on friends to buy me a few bevies.

As for cleaning, my rota says Wednesday is consolidation day so I finally finished the bathroom, lord knows what that black stuff was around the shower drain; I think I’d rather not know. A quick flick around the kitchen and then I went around the whole flat getting rid of the scuff marks and mucky fingerprints on the walls. The final item on today’s list is going through a couple of suitcases and putting as many clothes in draws as I can, I have emptied one out on to the bed and sorted through it, I shall put those things away and do at least one more suitcase tonight, (there are four in all plus a laundry bag).

Forget that idea, I finished one suitcase and the laundry bag and the drawers are full, the other three suitcases went under the bed for now but at least I can now see around 66% of the living room floor. My “To do” database is also shrinking, from the initial 71 things I think it was and taking into account I added a few things, the list is now down to a mere 26 items none of which I can do at the moment without an injection of cash or my internet connection back on. I have £50 of Amazon vouchers in various online survey accounts plus around £25 in cash on another but I can’t get at them for another nine days which is so frustrating.

A quiet and pleasant end to the day, my temporary crown came of my tooth but in my experience they always do. I evicted a few daddy-long-legs spiders from the bathroom earlier thanks to the long handled dustpan and brush which was a present from Rose and Pete, that thing is an absolute godsend. I also have my pictures hung up, My Japanese goddess of the spring, my favourite, bird’s eye view map of Paris from 1993 and my print of Monet’s Japanese bridge at Giverney. All needed a good cleaning as the years of tobacco stains had dullened them somewhat but that won’t be a problem anymore. The only print I would really like is one that Julie had in her bathroom of all places, a copy of Renoir’s Umbrellas, I really love that painting. As last night, I imagine I shall be “faffing” about doing the slightest little cleaning jobs until the early hours because I can’t settle but at least I’m keeping the place clean and when it is complete I will be proud to invite visitors in and call this place “my home.”

Thought for the day:
When flying to Spain I like to sit at the rear of the aircraft, you never heard of a plane reversing into a mountain.”

NOVEMBER: New home, turning 47, and dreams of Calella.

Day 1: Friday November 11.

After weeks of sleepless nights, sleeping in because of muscle cramps, getting out of bed at 8:20 am was a distant memory. However, up I was and though the flesh was weak the spirit was willing. Dad had travelled up from Cornwall the day before and as promised turned up at 8:30 on the dot. God bless him.

We walked through the town to the Letting agency and signed the tenancy agreement and finally I had the keys to my new place. On returning to Orchard Street or as over the last nine years, four months and one week had come to know it, “Dog S**t Court.” We loaded up dad’s car with the junk that I had been hoarding over the years minus a very heavy oil radiator which luckily a scrap metal merchant collected the morning before after I heard them coming down the street. I felt more than a little guilty letting my dad do most of the lifting and carrying but I did what I could to help when we got to the recycle centre at Grendon but I am limited by my Buerger’s Disease.

Back home and after a brief two minute silence in memory of the fallen heroes on this, Armistice Day, the 11th hour of the 11th month of the 11th year, Dad in his car and me in my living room, we made three or four journeys to the new flat at the Uplands on Upper Gungate after which I’m sad to say my poor legs couldn’t take anymore. We called it a day at that and dad went for something to eat whilst I texted my baby bro Cliff asking him for his help the following morning.

I was going to have a couple of hours sleep but my friend Julie from Bristol was talking to me on Yahoo Messenger about my new flat and her high blood pressure and heart problems so I didn’t get my kip but I wouldn’t have rested until I knew she was reasonably okay, we did spend most of the summer together, Dad texted me to see if I was awake, (didn’t get to bed) he came down and loaded up his car with some more stuff to take straight up to the Uplands the following morning. I did stay up to follow the Ireland Vs Estonia game via updates on the internet as the match was only available on pay per view on Sky, Rupert “Satan” Murdoch’s foothold on his ambitious way to take over the world.

Quote for the Day:
“The fewer the facts the stronger the opinion.” Arnold. H. Glasgow, US entrepreneur.

Day 2: Saturday November 12.

Another early start by my recent standards, Cliff turned up on time and dad was only five minutes behind with Aunt Rose armed and dangerous with cleaning products. I must just like to make this point that if it wasn’t for my dad and Rose in particular that right now I may be girding myself for another harsh winter without heating or hot water in Orchard Street. Again I did what I could but Cliff and Dad did all the heavy work whilst Rose declared war on 9 years of grime and a sterling job she did to after we had all finished the vacuuming and getting rid of the cobwebs Team O’Connor left the landlord with nothing more than to replace the old carpet which wasn’t his to start with and give the place a lick of Magnolia paint (cringe) I f**king hate magnolia!

After dropping Rose back home Cliff drove me to the Uplands, this was it. Brave new world. I said I needed some sleep and he left to go and be with his daughters who he hadn’t seen all week. He suggested I roll the futon out and just crash but I decided to make a start and put the bed together. After about two hours and several swear words, several in Irish Gaelic, I managed to get it put together and went for a sleep.

Four hours later, I awoke and started unpacking, moving things where I wanted them for future tasks, one thing I’ve always prided myself is my logistic skills. I then started the Sisyphean task of cleaning starting with the kitchen, the heart of any home. I actually managed to get quite a lot done before a cup a soup, cheese and onion on biscuits then bed in the early hours. NB: They still haven’t cleared that rat’s nest from outside my back window after promising it would be done when Rose and I first viewed the property over four weeks ago; I’m hoping this isn’t a portent of things to come. My neighbour’s seem nice and I don’t think it will be long before I can sleep without ear plugs or open my door in the morning to be greeted by the sight of freshly laid dog faeces.

Thought for the day:
If a doctor does something wrong they is struck off, if a barrister does similar they are disbarred, a teacher suspended soldiers courts marshalled, a priest defrocked, you and I would be sacked so… why is it the complete opposite for bankers?


Day 3: Sunday November 13.

After a late night and the best night’s sleep I’d had in ages I was going to wash up but found that there wasn’t a plug for the kitchen sink. I spent my last £1 buying 4 onions from Morrison’s and trekked down to my old Costcutters just to by a sink plug, On the way down my legs were in pain and I was frustrated because I couldn’t wash up but I remember laughing, sometimes you must just bow to the absurd. I was actually amazed as to how much I got done later. The kitchen was two thirds to my liking, most of my things were now out of bags and into boxes and after an hour or so of connecting cables and a few more Gaelic and Anglo-Saxon swear words I connected all the utilities to my PC, All I need now is for Virgin Media to connect my phone, TV and Broadband, there’s only so much I can play 24 songs and how many games of solitaire one can play before going slightly mad.

I pressed on with the kitchen and was very pleased with my efforts but as in the past when I had invited guests over and wished to make a good impression I found myself constantly cleaning up after every little stain and was adversed to touching anything so I went back to the living room with all those boxes and started to move them around to save space in a bizarre real live version of Tetris.

I did manage to find Miriel’s moving in present of cushions and lovely card, thank you so much, they will make a lovely addition to the home when I find the chairs, lol.

Third night of cheese, onion and biscuits with cup a soups but then I am still in the mindset of creating more mess until I’ve cleaned properly and got things how I want them. Tired, I spent the early hours moving, cleaning little things and before I went to bed at around 4:30am wrote a database entitled “Thing s to do” To facilitate things.

Definition for the day:
Disneyland: A people trap operated by a mouse.

Day 3: Monday November 14.

Manic Monday: The start of a new week and time to take a brief break from cleaning and hobble into town to slay the ogres of officialdom. Before that I had to answer texts and calls from Cliff, dad and Rose when I eventually found my phone charger. After getting 100 meters, that’s 109.36 yards in real money I realized that I had forgotten the books and games I was to take to the charity shop but I was nearly at the doctor’s and my legs were cramping up. I requested a form for a change of address and a form so that I can book future appointments with Dr Bruce (lovely Scotsman) online.

Off into town, first stop, council. Change of circumstances, which was a lot quicker than I thought judging by previous encounters with municipal b*ll*cks. The lady was very helpful and I got things sorted quickly, I was told that I needed to provide them with my tenancy agreement.

Next stop, Cash converters to sell my complete first series of Star Trek The Next Generation on Video but they don’t do videos anymore so I plan to put them on EBay, a collector will snap them up.

A quick 10 minute look in Wilkinson’s for some space saving ideas gave me food for thought, there were some very good deals and I made note of several items for future reference but I need to sort the essentials out first, (Database). Most notably were a small shelf for the bathroom, and a utensil holder, neither of which are a priority right now.

Thought for the day:
Good advice is seldom worth anything, wise men don’t need it and fools never listen.

Rutherford’s was my next stop for my copy of the tenancy agreement which I was informed wasn’t available until the following morning (type faster). The DWP change of circumstances was also quicker than I expected, I was only on hold for two minutes (EON take note) and in the mean time I was treated to Vivaldi’s Four Seasons, summer movement. All done then it was back home for some more scrubbing, Aunt Rose and Uncle Pete came round literally 15 minutes after I got home to give me a new set of bedding as a home warming gift and I slept very well that night, thank you both. It was probably then, when they were my first “official visitors” that I started to smile and started to believe that this was a place that I wouldn’t be embarrassed about inviting people in unlike “Dog S**t Court” with “Chav Drug Dealer Central.” across the road.

I stayed up until 5am mainly because I was buzzing with ideas and couldn’t settle the kitchen was almost clean, vegetable bins, toasted sandwich maker, and oven to clean withstanding. On the plus side, I stored a few things in the loft space and for the first time managed to shut the bathroom door. Also, I cooked something wholesome to eat instead of the packet soups I’d been living on. Okay, it was only oven chips, fish fingers, peas and garlic mayo but it was a start. I did a few more little things before I decided enough was enough because I lost track of time and it was 5am before I noticed.

Definitions for the day:
Banker: A person who gives you an umbrella when the sun is shining but demands it back when it starts to rain.
Consultant: A person who borrows your watch to tell you the time.

Day 4: Tuesday November 15.

I was rudely woken by the sound of the smoke alarm beeping, obviously I had run out of credit, and the electric had run out. I went back to sleep and two hours later Liz from the landlord’s office came round with a side door key, (which doesn’t work.) I would have thought that she would have tried it first! When I finally got my @r$€ in gear, The doctor’s was my first stop for a change of address then back to Orchard Street to check on mail as the £8 I paid for mail direction for one month doesn’t begin until Thursday. I soldiered on despite the cramp in my legs and gave about a dozen books and a couple of games to the charity shop Sue Ryder Care before collecting my tenancy agreement from Rutherford’s then taking said agreement to the council, I was interviewed by the same lady as the day before and though it took a while I got the first month’s rent paid to my account. (Sorted Dad.)

Last stop and running out of time it was my 73rd blood donation at the assembly rooms, I was late because of a delay at the council amending my details and taping a bathroom shelf and browsing other items in Wilkinson’s for my new home. I was actually shocked to discover that I may have to wait until 5:35pm (nearly an hour) to donate. Worse was to come. I was told that my HB level (Iron) was to low, 135 is the minimum they accept and mine was 111. I was referred back to my doctor and was unable to donate. Another puzzle for him to solve, maybe he will get his name in the Lancet.

I have decided to move the freezer into the hall and get a fridge to slot into that space. It will make more room. I’ve also decided to get rid of a few former sentimental things. My main concerns this evening as I prepare for supper and bed are I can’t find my passport, I will have to go through my boxes tomorrow after I pay my bills. Anyway, after the exact same supper as last night and a double Mulligatawny soup it’s time for bed. I will get to make that Mushroom Stroganoff that I bought the onions for and to use the mushrooms up because I haven’t a fridge yet soon. I hate waste and I’ve already had to throw out a third of a loaf of bread because it had gone mouldy even in the cool bag.

Thought for the day: If you can’t pay a priest for an exorcism can you be repossessed?

Day 5: Wednesday November 16.

Wednesday! Pay day, read: pay bills day. I slept in again but I don’t think I got to bed until 5:30 am in the morning, if I start something I just can’t stop. To paraphrase Samuel Beckett “Perhaps my best days are behind me but I would not trade them for the fire that is in me now.”

Late in the afternoon I made my way into town, first stop Post Office to get my money then down to Rutherford’s to inform them that the key doesn’t fit, I bent it trying and I don’t want to be liable for new locks if it broke, certainly not with the rip off rates locksmiths charge. I also had to give them a nudge that the rat’s nest outside my window is STILL there. By then time was moving on and I wanted to get to the Building Society before they close to pay some money into my account.

I made it with time to spare and even had time to go back on myself to Poundland for some cigarette papers. I ended up spending £7! Well, I did need some scouring sponges and a diary for next year. I also bought 3 boxes of Lancashire tea (Easter I think before I need to by anymore) and a small jar of Red Mountain coffee, I rarely drink it myself but, as like this morning my milk had evolved into a new life form, bred, formed its own religion and emancipated cows, I like black coffee plus I can offer guests coffee instead of just tea for the first time in months. Just to reiterate, I want this new home to be a place that I would be happy to invite visitors in which I was never comfortable at Orchard Street.

The Coop was my next stop for a lottery ticket (You never know) and to put £20 on my electric key, I really must work out these storage heaters as I’m running up a huge bill. I didn’t do any shopping there as the prices are a little steep, okay I like the Coop mainly because of their ethical fair trade policy but they never seem to have what I want, the store is very elderly orientated, I think they still sell gravy browning. So I left and as my legs were getting slowly worse I decided to stop off at Bond’s for a rest and a pint. I took a seat, opened up my crossword magazine, and just watched the world go by for an hour or so.

As the night was drawing in I popped back to the Coop just to pay my TV license payment and Council tax before making my way home.

I had already decided to stop off at Morrison’s and get my groceries in, I mean, I don’t have a lot of spare cash but at least the bills are paid and I have food in. I spent £30.07 in the end but there was nothing extravagant. I bought the now obligatory cup a soups and also, cheese, a nice sized chicken for £4, sweet corn and a pint of Cravendale milk which will keep longer until I can get a fridge, surely someone will be wanting to get rid of one on Freecycle. Failing that I still have £50 in Amazon vouchers and the option of taking out a loan at the Tamworth Credit Union.

I think those mushrooms won’t survive much longer so I think I shall make that Mushroom Stroganoff (Yum ) with my special mashed potato for supper. Tomorrow I don’t think I need to go out so I can finish off the kitchen to the best I can without a fridge, then I want to go through these boxes and find my passport, I really don’t want to report this one as missing like the last one. Eventually I might even get started on the bathroom before the weekend but it is all in hand and in my master plan in my head.

Quote for the day:
“If you want to know what God thinks about money just look at some of the people he gives it to.”
Rosemary Snelson (neé Reid)